423 in idea barrages

1.) No, what we meant was that the gluten therein was at no extra charge.

2.) Life, it seems, is a process of figuring out who you are and what you’re able to do then hoping you’ve got enough time after that to do it.

3.) Bad enough when a celebrity whose work you enjoyed passes then come the terrible “in heaven now” editorial cartoons to add insult to injury.

4.) The opposite of life isn’t death, death is a part of the cycle of living. The opposite of life is stagnation.

5.) Eventually Samantha was sick of the Kravitz’ snooping & cursed them so their son would become a bad Jimi Hendrix impersonator.

6.) In the frozen north, it is gauche to bitch about the heat but I will damn the mugginess to my last humidity-choked breath.

7.) If I worked in a bakery, I’d be fired for yelling “Batter up!” too often in like three days.

8.) It’s a shame we wasted the name on a hellish war crime factory because Gitmo would be a great name for a convenience store.