1115 in idea barrages

1.) I like to think that Lady And The Trump would be about the dog biting his face off and becoming a national hero.

2.) Whenever someone calls a footrace in November a “turkey trot” all I can think of in intestinal distress from undercooked bird.

3.) This is no clash of civilizations. This is a collection of armed theocracies TRYING to create one for power/profit. Humanity can be better.

4.) The prequels to Storage Wars, despite just being hoarders filling storage lockers, are still better than the Star Wars prequels.

5.) I doubt even Dire Straits or Fleetwood Mac could tell “You Make Lovin’ Fun” & “Money For Nothing” apart from the first few bars.

6.) The big dirty secret of Pokemon is that Squirtle’s really just peeing.

7.) Spiritual journeys so often leading to spiritual gurneys, man, you can hardly tell the words apart.

8.) Whenever I see an “Event Staff” t-shirt, I want to ask if I can order boxers in that design but I never do.

9.) Have the Avett Brothers toured with Elvis Costello as “Avetts and Costello” yet? If so, why not? Show your work.

10.) Tonight I realized the best compliment I can give someone is “I’d rather hear you than hear myself speak”.