I'm feeling the economy right now. in Age 35

I know we all are feeling this right now. Inflation sucks. I guess I just never thought it would be this bad. I’m an RN. My husband is teacher. Together we make a pretty decent living. We have two kids. Three cars (husband had a second baby crisis), two dogs, and we own a home.

And we’re house poor.

A colleague of mine explained what this was. Basically you have enough income to pay for your house and all the expenses in your life, but you are still paycheck to paycheck. After all the bills are paid and groceries are bought, you are probably only left with about 150 or 200 until your next check. So there is no money to save.

Let me clarify that we did not start out this way. We were more than fine before the pandemic and inflation. We could save modestly in case of emergencies etc. Afterward though, we could not. Keeping all our same expenses, we were finding ourselves barely staying afloat. And then came the bills. A repair here, a child expense there....Now after all the rains earlier this year, we are finding that we have many leaks in our roof. So guess what? New roof! More money to spend that we don’t have and are trying very hard to scrounge up.

I have a bachelor’s degree in one of the most respected fields in the world. And yet I could barely afford to give my son a good birthday coming up. I think that’s when it really hit me. There were things I wanted to do for my son for his 6th birthday. I couldn’t afford them.

I feel like shit.

Wasn’t this why I studied? So I wouldn’t have to struggle in life? So that if I ever did have children they could have a good life? I mean, they do. They have food in their bellies, clothes on their backs, and a (leaky) roof over their heads. There is not much they want for. I guess its mostly in my head that they need more. I want their lives lush you know? Without overly spoiling them of course.

How did I get here? More importantly, how the hell do I get out? I don’t want to be here. It sucks here. Brokeville. I also need new tires. That’s another 1500 dollars that I don’t have. I know, I know…there are other people that have it worse than me, but you know what? I don’t know what that feels like (nor do I want to), but this is my worse. This is one of the lowest points I have had. I feel small.

Last updated May 26, 2023